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Sunday, July 19, 2009
thoughts 3:13 PM

sometimes when i am still awake in bed, i start thinking about it

especially after someone asked me about it during the day

i go back and lie down and just ponder for a moment

then sometimes my heart rate quickens and i feel my palms starting to sweat

i feel nerves and i am lying there, agitated and a little scared

what happens if i don't?

what's next?

this really keeps me up at night sometimes

which is why i try my best not to think about it at all

but yet, sometimes.. it just hits me from no where and i'm left lying there, feeling scared